Dream Log

Triple Whammy
(nightmare edition)

While I won't detail the specifics of these nightmares because in retrospect they were quite boring; two were regarding getting hacked online and one nebulously about my mom (which is weird cause I have a great relationship with her), I mostly just want to document that I had three nightmares in one night.

I woke up from one of the hacking ones mid panic attack at 2am and struggled to sleep again.

Cyber Stalking
(nightmare edition)

I was just browsing on my phone and realised I had gotten added to an old WoW raid discord server, getting pinged by an account I didn't know that was saying really awful sexually violent things to and about me. I simply blocked and left the server, and told my partner. They were convinced it was a mutual friends just trying to make an edgy joke, but I didn't believe it.

After blocking, I thought it would be over, but then websites started popping up on my screen. One was a sexually violent poem about me, another was a collage of photos of me that I didn't know existed. I kept blocking these websites and a new one popped up, including a countdown. The person behind the stalking warned me on the countdown that I should watch it until it hit zero, but I didn't listen, and simply blocked the countdown site too.

Ah, but then the final website appeared. It was lots of little squares, streams of me from different time periods, all from the same spot in my room. Like the stalker had been watching me longer than I could imagine.

I woke up after that.

Two For One
(nightmare edition)

I think I was a prostitute? Some sort of sex worker, except some sort of manager was there to make sure nothing went wrong. After the act with some guy, my manager took photos of me and the guy where I felt forced to smile. I did not want my photo taken, but I felt pressured. These photos immediately ended up online where old school friends were making fun of me for it, and I felt incredibly exposed and didn't know who why the manager had betrayed me.

I woke up after this, but slept some more where I had another dream about suddenly finding two gerbils in my room. I've kept rodents before (very good pets, very rewarding but also a lot of hard work and expensive!) but I've never had gerbils. There was two of them, one completely brown and one with a brown top and white underside. They were terrified, kept getting lost in my room as I was trying to collect them and calm them down. When I found one, the other would escape my hold, and it became a constant catch and chase. Eventually I caught the most skittish one and put them inside of a homemade euthanasia chamber... I'm not sure why? I think my mom was talking about how I don't have the room to keep them, but that I can't release them into the wild because they're clearly pets, so they would just die in that case too... Therefore euthanasia was the most humane thing to do. I felt awful about it though.

Woke up before capturing and killing the second one.

???

It might seem weird to be writing a dream entry when I don't remember anything about the dream, but I wanna note some things down anyway.

I woke up crying. Like, in the middle of actually sobbing. My chest was tight and the strongest emotion I felt was fear... Almost as if I was getting chased/stalked, in immediate danger. Sometimes when I wake up after strong dreams/nightmares, the feeling persists for a while after.

That happened today. I was too scared to leave my bed for a good five minutes, despite not knowing what I should be scared of. My back hurts from stress tensing lmfao...

Streaming

Locked in a streamer collective house; my worst nightmare.

Not very much happened. There were a bunch of 'streamers' around me but not anyone recogniseable, like no one famous IRL. I actually hate watching streams and find them to be so boring so I didn't interact with anyone the whole dream because we had nothing in common... I think I was just there for food and a roof over my head.

I didn't stream with anyone or have my own stream, so as they were collabing and stuff I hid in my room to escape being on camera. Everyone got drunk and started drama or something, details are a bit fuzzy.

Art School

In a school setting, but specifically for 'misfits' or something. Lots of art related activities; I was a goody two shoes in school though so I'm not sure why I was there. And the label 'misfit' felt ill-fitting to me because some girl literally tried to stab me to death over my critique—which was required for study—of her portrait painting of her boyfriend.

It sucked, but I was trying to be kind about it. Offering actual help and critisism to help her get a beter grade. But I spent the remaining half of the dream just running away from her as she chased me with a knife.

She kinda looked like me, but younger. I don't think she actually was, but it's something to note for dream interpretation I suppose. I woke up as I was hiding under a desk, and she had just entered my classroom.

Field Rat

There was a table in the middle of an empty field so I sat down there to eat dinner and study, though the details of the dinner and study material are lost on me now. What happened was I remained there for three days and three nights, just reading and eating, and it was one of those dreams where time seems to stretch? As if I had actually waited three IRL days and nights. The field was nice and calm though, and I felt safe, so I wasn't particularly bored.

My family came to visit me to make sure I was okay on the fourth morning, and I realised that four walls had been constructed around me. My new 'room' was still just the field though, like I had just been encased in the middle of the field rather than moving to a new area.

Anyway, upon their visit I heard horrified screams and when I looked towards what my family were shouting about, I saw a huge mummified rat on my table where my food was. It was freakishly large, about the size of a medium dog, but quite clearly a rat. Very dead too, but it was stuck in an expression of fear? I hadn't been eating it, there were no marks suggesting as such, but I felt so bad for not realising there was a dead rat on my table. I remember feeling guilt for not burying it. I was in the middle of apologising to the rat when I woke up.

Hospital

I was staying the night in a hospital with my partner, but they fell asleep before me so I was just hanging out with some other patients. We all got along well and were having a good time together until one of them tried to have sex with me. I turned her down because not only was I not interested, but I have a partner already, and while she respected my answer she then killed herself for some reason.

Car Crash

My brother had just learnt to drive, so me and my mom were driving behind them to make sure they were okay. They were driving one of those white work vans you see everywhere, but just as their main vehicle? Like it wasn't tied to work or anything. Anyway, we're driving slowly in our street which is actually horrendous for driving IRL, which was perfectly replicated in my dream, so it didn't surprise me when my brother had accidentally crashed into a parked car just ahead of us.

My mom was panicking but I laughed at the absurdity of it. I remember saying something like "How can you crash into something not moving?" but my mom scolded me for not being more understanding. Turns out my brother was laughing too though, and upon seeing that my brother wasn't harmed, my mom started laughing too.

Two For One

Dreamed that my dad invited me to a party where I attended in good will, but I ended up avoiding him most of the night. My uncles were there too who hate him so they left early, and I begged one uncle to take me with him. He reluctantly agreed, only because my dad was stalking after me with a weapon in hand, but I understood my uncles reluctance to be because he didnt wanna get involved, not because he didnt wanna help me. On the drive home, to avoid my dad, my uncle pulled into a discreet shop and got a new car. We made it home safely where I promised my mom I wouldn't visit my dad ever again.

In another dream, I was following someone familiar around, though I can't remember who exactly now that I'm awake. Only that we were trapped in some sort of bond villain situation, under ground under the ocean. It reminded me a lot of the first or second film? Whatever one is about the island. We were pretty lost and didn't find the exit before I woke up.

Barking

A dog was barking off in the distance, but I couldn't see it. The bark sounded familiar though and I was full of dread, frantically trying to find the source of the bark. Although looking back now, the bark didn't sound particularly distressed... I was just worried. I ran across a large field with tall grass and kept sneezing... I couldn't find the dog though, almost like I was looping a small section of the area instead of making progress? The bark never sounded closer or further away despite how far I ran.

444 Angel

I kept seeing the number 444 everywhere. It's an angel number, and the one I see most often in waking life, so it's cool to see it in my dreams too. I was convinced an angel was gonna come meet me, and though one never did, I woke up feeling a lot more at peace than I have done in a while, so I think that counts.

Awful Book

I was trying to return a book that I ended up hating to the book store, but they wouldn't accept my return because they said it was similar to purchasing a meal, eating it all, and then saying you didn't like it... I thought this was stupid because I hadn't even finished the book, but they were adamant. I woke up as I was angrily leaving the store.

An Evening Walk

Lost in an unfamiliar place, I spent most of the dream wandering around what looked to be a neverending pier. It was late, some time around dusk, and I had this urge to find something. Specifically, I have no clue! Only that it was important enough to continue walking in what felt like circles, growing increasingly frantic as the tide was quickly approaching and the sun surely setting. I never did find what I was looking for...!